tiger13 640 doomsday 604x341 Dear Public, Are You There Still? Its Me Tiger!

This morning, Tiger Woods made a public apology citing his deep sorrow for sleeping with all those women, but I don’t buy it.  Sure, I bet he’s sad, but not over banging tons and tons of hot chicks, but because he got caught.

Why should Tiger take his apology and shove it?  Keep reading for the answer!

Sure he wants to reclaim his good guy image, this much is obvious, especially after he directly apologized to every child who’s looked up to him saying, “”Parents used to point to me as a role model for their kids. I owe all those families a special apology.”

Of course he wants to apologize to them, they’ve made his career.  How will he get back all of his endorsements without looking super distraught on stage?  This is not about making amends, sorrow or wanting to reclaim his family.  This is about money.

Lucky for Tiger, money isn’t just the root of his problem, but the solution.  I wish he’d spared me these 13-minutes and instead become chief investor in “The Bunny Ranch” a brothel outside Las Vegas.  At least, I would know that Tiger is a man that stands up for what he truly loves, and the obvious answer to that is whores.

Tiger needs to think of the Charlie Sheen as his role model.  Charlie Sheen, the Hollywood’s patron saint of prostitutes, shouldn’t even have a career, but after everything, the whores, the drugs and the supposed battering of wives–CHARLIE IS ON THE TOP OF HIS GAME.  And why is that?  Because he’s not sorry.

America loves an underdog, especially if that underdog has a seedy secret life that really isn’t secret.  Tiger, we didn’t want your apology.  The only person that wanted and deserved it is your wife.  What we want is a play by play of what you did with whom, the unapologetic truth.

To see the video click here.

  1. Colin says:

    I would probably buy this dude’s biography.

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