Studies Say That Social Media Is Ruining Our Sex Lives

Since JACK FM is presumably a totally asexual inanimate radio station, we have no actual sex life to complain about, but if JACK FM were a real boy, we suspect the only thing that would be growing would be our noses.

However, studies show that for most modern flesh-covered beings the boon of social media i.e. Facebook, Twitter, etc is ruining peoples’ sex lives. Or at least British people since this study was done on the other side of the pond.

It’s pretty logical how the internetz is ruining baby makin’ but the lovely people at the Daily Mail broke it down for us. So, people are going to sleep on average 90 minutes later than they used to 10 years ago, around midnight. Why? Because 46 per cent on surfing the web in bed. About 15 percent of people are having less sex because of this.

This is partially a product of our longer work days. A 28-year-old woman named Debbie Fox says that she gets home too late to watch anything fun on TV or call her friends (call? what’s that?).

“I always end up taking my laptop and phone to bed with me and make the most of all that’s available online in the comfort of my bed – I can see what my friends have been up to and watch catch up TV when it suits me,” said Fox.

We always knew that cyberlovers were the future. Soon we won’t even need human interaction and inanimate radio stations like us can get us some.

–Nadia Noir, CBS Radio Los Angeles


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